Oh friends! I survived! She was five weeks old this Wednesday! I would love to paint this beautiful picture of motherhood for you, but it wasn't quite that way. It was real, and hard, and it made me stronger, and it was completely perfect all at once. There were beautiful moments, and I'm so thankful for those, they kept me alive! When my little "Lottie Pop" arrived we were still not in our home. My baby things were in boxes that I couldn't find. Ben was using his time off of work, working constantly to get us back in our house. I was experiencing my worst recovery after any birth so far. Lyric was having a tough time adjusting to sharing her mama with a new baby (which broke my heart). I can't even describe how grateful I felt, only my closest friends and family knew that Lottie's heart was showing signs of distress in the weeks before birth. Ben and I gave it to God, and when my love was born into that room full of waiting professionals, we found that they weren't needed at all!! Her heart was perfect!! And her birth was perfect! I prayed for an easy delivery and that's just what I had. She was the easiest delivery of any of my babies. His grace is such a beautiful thing!!!
Of course my preemie (like all of mine) spent some time on the light bed because of jaundice. Her sisters and brother spent time by her bed waiting for a chance to hold her.
These pictures of them waiting are always some of my favorites. What beautiful little hearts that have!
This guy, my stunt man, broke his foot when Lottie was 6 days old. He is a 10 year old free runner, skateboarder, BMX biker, climber, and he sure can worry his mama!! Even though he was walking on the foot I had a gut feeling that it was broken. Sure enough, it was. The folks at the orthopedic practice now just say when we leave "See ya next time!" Ha! And when we come in they always ask "How many kids do you have this time?" We love them!
This little one started nursing her baby. :)
The night before I had Lottie I woke up, excited and feeling like my time was close, made this bonnet and went back to bed. I'm so glad I did! It made me feel good for this little one to be born with something mama made just for her.
That angel!!
Lottie had a friend born the same day as her! We managed to snap a picture of them together. They are birthday twins!
And this....
Yesterday I took the time to take pictures of each baby, because when mama is this busy with 4 babies, 3 years old and under, it's easy to get caught up in the work and forget to stop and really SEE it! It's hard to remember to take pictures too. Just that one thing felt like an accomplishment! My Penny Pie, a 16 month old love bug! She is such a loving little girl!
My Lottie Pop! This precious baby is certainly my calm after this little life storm that we've been in. She is such a calm, sweet, patient baby. *love*
My little Lyric Lou Who is now almost 8 months old, and such a happy girl!! Her precious smile can light a whole room! She's such a gift, being her temporary mama has been such a joy!!
If I were to describe my days right now it would go something like this....there are moments where I feel like I've got this!! Like I should be wearing a cape even! Super mom! And then the next moment (like the moment after I snapped this picture) someone projectile vomits and chaos is in full force on e again, and mama is humbled. I send up petitions for grace from my Father almost constantly! When asked how we do it Ben always answers with a smile "We have just become good managers of chaos!" Yes we have love. It's a beautiful mess.
I'll be back soon! I'm sorry I'm not around as much these days, I do miss it. I've joined the Instagram crowd! My big kids say it's the "thing" these days. :) Hit me up on there! I'm mama_caffee. xo, Sam
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