Tuesday, November 3, 2009

Friends, please pray for us today.

I have been planning this post for weeks now, thinking about how much fun it was going to be.....I was going to show you my first ultrasound picture from yesterday and tell you how excited and grateful we are to be expecting another little angel, but this little one is already in trouble. We need prayer and a miracle. The doctor didn't see everything he needed to see on the ultrasound and the outcome doesn't look good. He said "the odds are stacked against us and statistically it doesn't look good" but he also said "I'm not ready to throw in the towel" and "We know God can change things".... I am so heartbroken today. I'm scheduled for another ultrasound on Tuesday, if they find what they want to see we will move on cautiously but if they don't see a change I will be scheduled for a D&C on Wednesday.

I have so many different emotions pulsing through me this morning. My heart is not at peace, I'm still struggling to find where I should stand and what I should feel. Should I prepare my heart for the heartache I know so well, or should I hang on to that shred of hope and wait for a miracle? I wish I were strong and decided on how to feel.....at least I know what I believe. I may not always be able to control or understand my feelings (especially when they are so charged with hormones) but I will always know what I believe.......I believe that no matter what happens His grace will be sufficient, I know that "all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose" (Romans 8:28), and I know that He has given me a very precious gift, a beautiful family, a wonderful strong husband, three precious biological children, and more children waiting in an orphanage in Bulgaria.




Please pray for my little one and our family this week, it would mean so much to me. Thank you friends. xoxo, Samantha

51 comments:

Lex and Lilly's Mom said...

I will keep you and your family in my prayers. I hope that it is God's will to bless you with another biological child along with more from Bulgaria.

Jessica @ Colorado Crafter said...

Praying for all of you Samantha.

Dawn said...

You'll all be in my thoughts and prayers.

Kelli said...

I'm so sorry to hear this, Samantha. I will pray that God's peace that passes all understanding will permeate your heart and mind in these coming days. I will also pray for a miracle!

Feather Webb said...

prayers coming your way.

Autum said...

Samantha,
It was exactly a year ago, our family was going through a very similar situation and you supported us with your prayers. I'm so, so, sorry sweet Samantha that you are going through this difficult time. I will be praying for you and your family and for the doctors caring for you. Praying for a miracle!

Joy said...

Praying fervently Samantha! Love to you dear one!

bakeandsew said...

I'm so sorry to hear that you are having this heartache all over again. My thoughts are with you and your family. x

Jody said...

I'm so sorry that all might not be well with your wee little one. I will be praying for you.

Amy said...

You are all in my thoughts and prayers; courage during this trying time.

6blessings said...

"Turn your eyes upon Jesus, Look full in His wonderful face, And the things of earth will grow strangely dim, In the light of His glory and grace. ..."

I'm praying for a miracle.

The Cains said...

Samantha, I will be thinking and praying for you continuously.

ANd Lord Jesus, I pray right now that you will bind Samantha's heart to yours and that the emotions and feelings she experiences will be ordained by you alone. I pray for peace and strength for Ben and ask that you be present in their home now more than ever. Amen.

mArCeLe said...

God is love and knows what he does. Calm your heart and wait for his decision. Sending good thoughts and nurturing!

Rhonda said...

Samantha:
I'll pray for you and your family. I know too well this type of heartache and I do pray that things turn out the way you desire. If not, I'll pray God gives you His sweet comfort as only He can.
Blessings,
~Rhonda

Rose and Ivy said...

Samantha-- lots of hugs and prayers coming your way-- I'll be thinking about you xox

khristal said...

I've read your bog for alittle over a year now and will include you in my thoughts and prayers.

Anna said...

praying for a miracle for you and your family...

seemommysew said...

I'm so sorry Samantha! I'll be praying!

Pomona said...

I do hope things go well for you, Samantha, but I also know that faith and family sustained you before, and they will again, whatever the future brings. With very best wishes

Pomona x

Renata said...

Definitely praying for you & your baby, Samantha.

Goosegirl said...

Oh Sam, I will be praying. My heart hurts for you.
I pray that you will know very clearly what you should do. I know how much this hurts.

Hugs and prayers.
Sivje

Attilio said...

God takes us to it and
God takes us through it

without Him we just dont do it

Am sure that whatever His plan for you is, it will be the best.
Remembering your family in my prayers
Becky

Anonymous said...

I know you don't know me, but as these blogs go, I feel like I know you. And I will be praying for you, your family, and your dear little baby.
most sincerely, kathleen hogue

jenn said...

Please please stay strong! I am praying for you. I can relate very much to your post! When I had my very first ultrasoudn with my 2nd daughter, Emma,it was very troubling.
They told me there was no heartbeat, and the sak was very irregular.. it looked really bad. Needless to say, she is 6 years old and a pistol! I don't know your circumstances of course, but please stay strong! ( Iknow you will!)

Hayes said...

You've got my prayer friend. And I can bring you dinner on Thursday night too. If you get a chance, drop me an emai. Love you, Sam.

littlechrissy said...

You don't know me, but I feel i know you through your blog and I was saddened to hear this news. I'm sending you strong, happy, healthy thoughts for your little one.
Chris x

Michelle said...

Knowing the pain and the hope, we will be praying for you here.

Team Manager said...

Praying...

me said...

in my prayers! may God grant you the desire of your heart!

Kimberly said...

My heart goes out to you, Samantha - I will certainly be praying with you.

Megan said...

I hope the ultrasound shows that she is growing exactly how she should be!

KBriggs said...

i am sending all of my prayers your way. God is in CONTROL!!! and He knows well what He is doing.
i am in a hormonal stage at this moment so i am feeling your heartache.
PRAYERS FOR YOU LITTLE ONE, YOU ANFD YOUR FAMILY!!!
<3

EchoOfMercy said...

We'll be sure to pray for you, Samantha. Just remember that God will be with you, no matter what the outcome. "Be still, and know that I am God" - Psalm 46:10

God Bless,
Alissa

Beth said...

prayers to you!

Jen P said...

My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family during this time.

Tracy P. said...

We are praying for you!

Jenny said...

I'm so sorry your family is going through this right now. You'll be in our thoughts and I really hope that Tuesday will show something completely different.
Take care,
Jenny

Brenda said...

Samantha,
I am praying for you and your family.

Brenda

KarenH said...

Praying here too!!!

Elizabeth said...

You're in our thoughts and prayers. Take care.

Debbie said...

Samantha,
I'm certainly praying!
Love you!

Courtney said...

You will be in my prayers. I pray that you are able to find peace.

kee said...

Our prayers are with you too.
xxx

Melanie said...

Samantha.. You are in my prayers. Gos is so wonderful. He has his plan. I will pray for peace and understanding. God bless you all.

Melanie

Mindy said...

I too am praying for you and your family!

Meghan said...

Thinking of you Samantha. You have my prayers.

ezeldabeth said...

i am praying...i didnt see an email address for you...i went through the worst (misscarriage) and the best (a miracle baby) throughout the last year and a half...i would love to share my experience with you and support you if you would be interested. beth(at)odditycomics-dot-com

Patricia Richardson said...

My prayers are with you and your family.

MARIKA said...

Please god for you and your family into a prayer . Marika

American History said...

your prayer request touched us.
We are praying for you.
We found this site helpful www.holylandprayer.com Check it; maybe it gives you a relief.
God bless you.

Sabrina said...

praying...