Thursday, March 5, 2009

A little out of sorts....

I have started this post a hundred times in my head but I chicken out when I start to write it.....Some of you may have noticed the comment moderation that I have had in place lately. There is a reason for that.

I'm a little emotional writing about this because so much of me goes into this blog, that I feel very sad about the things that have happened.....

Let me start by telling you why I blog. I love the way it helps me focus on the important things in life, I see my children differently when am able to reflect on our days and remember all of the special moments that we shared. I love the bond I feel with other mamas all over the world who comment when I write about something they can relate to. I love the inspiration, encouragement, and love that you all have shown me through the tough times I have had over the last few months. Really, there were times that I couldn't bring myself to talk to anyone face to face but you all were here anytime I needed you. I also love the occasional email from young mothers saying that they were inspired or encouraged by something I said. It really is so rewarding.

There are times that I feel guilty when I can't play all of the fun blog games or answer every comment. I know that most of you mamas understand that raising three children, homeschooling, and running a little pattern business sometimes won't allow me to do all of the things I would like to do. I feel like the important thing is to just keep writing and sharing.

Over the last couple of weeks I have had some questionable comments (3-4 comments). My first instinct was to just delete them and move on, and that's just what I did. Then I added comment moderation so that I could weed out the bad ones. The comments have now ranged from implying that I am a bad mother; to implying that I live a fake, "too good to be true" life; to now almost making fun of our simple, Christian, homeschooling lifestyle.

I really feel like I have shared my struggles as a mother openly here. I truly hope that no one thinks my life could be too good to be true by what they read here. I am blessed to be sure! And most of my posts are about our great adventures as a family because those are the things I most want to remember, those are the things that inspire me when I look back on them. God has blessed our family so much that I sometimes can't find the words to express my feelings in words. But please understand that the few words that I write here two to three times a week are just specks of our everyday life. You are looking at my life through a very small window. We are not perfect. We do experience pain. In fact I have experienced some of the hardest struggles of my life over the last few months.

So please, be kind….If you can't find something nice or encouraging to say, please just move on.

To those of you who always have something sweet and supportive to say, thank you. Seriously, I have been so touched by your kindness over and over. I have made so many wonderful friends over these last two years. I couldn't do this without you. Thank you.

xoxo,

Samantha

43 comments:

See Mommy Sew said...

I'm so sorry, Samantha! I don't know why anyone would be anything but nice to you....you seem so sweet and not fake at all! Why do people have to be so unkind?!

Stephanie @ My Answered Prayer said...

Hang in there! I'm so sorry that people are being that way. Keep writing, keep encouraging and hopefully those will see Christ through you!

Marlya said...

Samantha, I am sorry you have been hurt by some comments- The most obvious thing to me is that you love your husband and children dearly. You are a very kind, giving and talented lady with a lovely family. I love reading your posts

Tammi said...

I am sorry you are getting harassed. Don't people have anything better to do?

I enjoy reading your blog but don't always reply. I think you and your family are wonderful. Keep your chin up and know that what their issue is is theirs, not yours.

Jean said...

I'm so sorry you've gotten those comments, but you know what, they're probably not real. Some people just like to make nasty comments and stir things up. Whoever it is isn't interested in you personally--they're just finding random blogs and shooting off comments to cause trouble. Which mostly just shows that they need a real hobby. Hugs from California (I wish we got some snow!!)....

Kris J. said...

wow, i'm so sorry. your blog is such a lovely place to visit, i can't imagine why anyone would feel the need to say such things to you! you're a lovely person, thank you for sharing a little bit of yourself with us here :)

Artfulife said...

You would think that people had more important things to do with their time, than hurt others with negative words and unkind thoughts. I just recently found your blog and think you are so inspiring. Keep up your beautiful blog, it's nice to know there are other mothers out in the world who don't mind walking the path less traveled.

Tiny House said...

I think there is just a lot of bad commenting going on right now--this is the third post like this I've read this week. Good for you for saying something! Keep on doing what you're doing; I love to read your blog and see what you're making! :O)

Ahavah said...

You are an inspiration to me and I thoroughly enjoy your lovely, lovely blog.

Is there a way to report these people, or block their id's?

Handmade Housewife... said...

I have seen several bloggers post on this also. And the people that leave the rude comments seem to read several posts before leaving something negative...so obviously they find something interesting. Usually when people say something rude or negative it's just a reflection of what they feel are their own faults, or they really are just plain mean. Either way just know that they are in the minority and there are more of us out there who enjoy reading and are encouraged by your blog. Keep it up!

-Hayley

MarieGrace said...

There's always a few who have too much time on their hands and choose to use it to be mean to others. Unfortunately I think all of us who blog have been heckled a time or two.

Just keep doing what you're doing and delete the nasty stuff. No one expects you to live the life we see in your posts every minute of every day. My blog, and yours, are only small snippets of a much bigger picture and a way for us to reflect on our worlds. We all know that.

I am glad you have this place and thrilled that you make these fabulous dresses. Just yesterday Tater was wearing the first dress I made her from your Miss Madeline pattern back in the fall. Its her very favorite and she wears it with a little blue cardigan I knit for her. So you are a part of some of our favorite things... here in our little world.

Moderate the comments to make you feel better and just hit delete. Other than that... don't change a thing!

Hugs... Marie Grace

Trying Traditional said...

Hang in there and live the life you KNOW your meant to live! People can just be nasty sometimes. It starts in elementarty school and some never get past it into their adult years.

We, too, live the Christian, homeschoolers, trying to keep up with it all, but have fun life. It's hard work, but worth it over and over. When people attack these things, the very core of our daily lives, it hurts. My blog is all screen names and vague locations as I actually had a person sending nasty, mean, and borderline threatening emails to me when the twins had been home only a couple months. I still wonder how people have such mo free time and such a mean spirit.

On a side note, did you get the pics I sent. The dresses are adorable and I love the pattern!

ahomeschooladventure said...

Wow I am so surprised and sorry that you are having to go through this battle! I love reading your beautiful words and am glad that instead of giving up you are saying something! Hang in there!

Suzanne said...

Samantha,
Don't let these people change anything you do. Your blog is so "real" and I love to read it. Your writings are comforting and inspiring. I feel at home here. Take care.

Charlene T said...

The very first comment I ever had on my blog told me to get off the computer and then preceded to insult me....You have my complete sympathy. I was devastated for days. No one deserves those comments, especially you! I am so encouraged as a mom when I read your blog. I homeschool too, and I love sewing for my children. I look at what you write and I feel good about what I do too. Hang in there!

LadySnow said...

I am so sorry that you have to deal with this. It's terrible when people have nothing better to do than to put another Mama down. I will be praying for you and know that you are loved by many! :-)

Anonymous said...

To all the freaks and losers who are leaving nasty comments, I say shame on you! If you don't like the blog don't read it, you don't pay for it, you aren't obligated to read it and Sam is so sweet for sharing her life as an inspiration and giving us a little laugh during the day. Knowing Sam in real life I can say that who she is on the blog is a true reflection of who she is. I have been blessed to know her and I have had the pleasure of enjoying some of the adventures with her and her family. So, move on find something to do productive like making your own life better rather than trashing what you don't understand. KIM W

Anonymous said...

This brought to mind Matthew 5:11-12.
Don't be discouraged; I am always so blessed by your blog...by the chance to take a break and just enjoy something happy...there's nothing wrong with choosing to focus on the blessings in your life.

Artsy Momma said...

Samantha I am so sorry you had to deal with stuff! I have had a few trolls of my own in the past. Dont let them get to you otherwise they win!

Spring said...

Oh Samantha FORGET them!

These comments are only being left by people who wish they had what you have. If the person took the time to really read your blog they would see you are a "real" mom of three kids.
Keep on doing what your doing and don't let them get to you. Id really miss your blog if you stopped posting and I wouldn't enjoy it as much if you changed it.

Mean People Suck!

Linda B said...

The small number of people who take joy in putting others down really have self-esteem problems. It's not you...it's them. You keep on being that homeschooling hillbilly mama. You're my hero.

Holly said...

:-( That's just terrible! Please know that you do have readers (and lurkers I'm sure) who enjoy what you have to offer. What's that saying... You can't please all the people all of the time... There will always be people ready to tear us down. I'm convinced that's how God can show us our own strength... because His children are always supported and loved.

Still making these Miss Mollys! LOVE that pattern!

Alexas said...

I just found your blog, and wanted to say hello and sorry that there are people out there that can't even contain themselves enough to not leave comments on blogs. anyway, you're a wonderful mother (i can tell that already), and having just gone through a miscarriage myself, i understand the pain you're going through, and i'm frustrated that comments have made that even harder for you. thank you for your blog and for being so open!

cjoy said...

It's sad that there are people who have nothing better to do than cause strife - on any level. I recall hearing that if I couldn't say something nice, I shouldn't say anything at all.

I enjoy reading your blog and getting that small peek into your life. I wish I had more time to comment as well; you are a warm hearted lady who shares so openly. Thank you for YOU.

pfarmwife said...

Samantha, remember the words of Jesus, your Redeemer, "blessed are YOU when they revile and persecute you and say all kinds of evil against you falsely for my sake for great is your reward in Heaven, for so they persecuted the prophets who were before you." Do not let the enemy get you down. Persevere, sweet sister in Christ.

Warmly,
Stacey

Carolyn said...

I have your blog on a short list of my favorites to read. I just wanted you to know that I love the way you live your life and am glad to be able to learn from you through your blog. It takes a lot of courage to "expose yourself" to the world through a blog. It opens you up to criticism from those who have noting better to do than try to hurt others. They live a sad life.

Please don't stop blogging!

~Violet~ said...

Well phooey on whomever that was! I know you, and you are for real!! You are a great mother, wife, sister, and daughter, and especially a wonderful friend! I love visiting your blog and keeping in touch because I miss seeing you. You keep up all your great stories and encouraging posts! It always makes my day to get a good laugh about your kids and it lets me know mine are "normal" too! Love you!!

Molly said...

Hurray Samantha...I think you handled that VERY well! I'm sorry you have had to go through this, though. I have always appreciated your honesty and straight forwardness (is that a word?!) :) and am encouraged each time I read your posts. Keep your light shining, my friend, and they will see Jesus through you!

Deborah said...

Hello Samantha,

A few weeks ago I was the one who posted the comment about you being a bad mother. But now the Lord has convicted me, and now I am persuaded to say I'm sorry. I want you to understand that about a year ago, I did the same trick on my little girl, and to make a long story short, she didn't make it. When I saw the video of your son, it just flooded my mind with memories. Though I know that it was no excuse to say what I said, I hope you will find it in your heart to forgive me.

I have been looking through your blog, and I realize how much you love your children, and that you would never see harm come to them. So once again I'm so sorry.

dailythread said...

Oh, that's awful! There's no reason anyone would say those things unless they just want to be mean. Don't feel like it reflects on you. Your lifestyle is your choice (one I have chosen as well, of course, so I might be a bit biased). It's not anyone else's to judge. Let's leave the judging to the Lord! And also, I think you're plenty transparent about the realities of being a stay at home, homeschooling mama. Laundry on the living room table? Come on, people! Is that supposed to be glamorous or something??? Ha! Anyway, I'm sorry someone has made you feel badly. :(

Meghan said...

Samantha- don't think anything of comments like that! I'm not Christian and don't homeschool but have nothing but respect and admiration for your choices. People who decide to put you down because they are intolerant are really missing out! You and your family are just lovely!

maribeth said...

i am so sorry. why do people feel compelled to be ugly? i really enjoy your blog and your beautiful creations. i actually stumbled upon your blog right after my own miscarriage. as i read your words, i understood where you were coming from because i was right there, too. you were so open and honest about your pain, something i tend to hide especially when it is so personal. i started reading your blog regularly and have many times almost commented, but haven't. please know there are way more of us who enjoy your blog and believe in your genuineness than the one commenting. and, as for your pain, the following verse has provided immense comfort for me and i have wanted to share it with you. i pray it does the same for you.

"delight yourself in the Lord and He will give you the desires of your heart." psalm 37:4

Stacie said...

I can't believe you went to so much trouble to make "fake" snow just to take posed pictures so you can show off your so called "PERFECT" life!!! Ha Ha! What Jerks!!

I will never understand why people feel the need to just be down right mean to other people for absolutely no reason. I come across many blogs, some I read and never go back to and some I add to my bookmark and anxiously await the next post! Yours is one I check every day. I love reading about your family. I think its so wonderful to read about someone who loves their husband, kids and their life. You do have much to be grateful for, as do a lot of us, you just choose to express it!

Don't let the bad guys change you. We love you and look forward to seeing what you guys come up with next!
And by the way, I finished my first (of many) Miss Madeline dress. My daughter woke up and saw it on the chair. She had it on in 2 seconds and hasn't taken it off yet! She said, Oh Mama it is so beaut- i- full! Thank you so much for creating such a great and easy to use pattern that turned out exactly like it should!!

little dresses said...

*************************************

Oh Deborah,

I wish I could just hug you! I forgive you! Oh mama I am so sorry!

I understand now exactly what you mean! I know that I speak out of emotion and before I think more than I want to even own to. After going through two miscarriages in these last two years, sometimes when people complain of being pregnant "again" I often want to give them a piece of my mind. I know this doesn't even compare to what you must have felt, but I understand now why you would have wrote that.

Please don't give it another moments thought! I could never hold any hard feelings against you, you dear sweet mama. Oh, I am so sorry for what you have been through. My heart was just so heavy after reading your comment...I just can't even find words to tell you how sorry I am. Please keep coming here. You are welcome here anytime. I would be honored to be your friend. You showed great courage in coming back to apologize, I know you are a wonderful person. Thank you so much for writing back. My heart is just so full of compassion for you, I know we will be great friends.

Thank you again for coming back...it really meant a lot to me.

Love,
Samantha

Deborah said...

Samantha,

Thank you so much. I have been waiting since I posted my comment to see if you would respond. I now know that both God, and you have forgiven me. I am sorry for your loss, for I have never had to go through the pain of miscarriage. I promise to come, and visit your blog often, and I also promise that I will think before I comment.

God Bless!

Deborah

little dresses said...

*******************************************8
Deborah,

I am so glad that this has been made right! I feel so much better. God is so good! He can replace a situation like this with such a sense of overwhelming love! Isn't it beautiful!

Love,
Samantha
**********************

Anonymous said...

Hi, This is the first time I have read your blog, so apart from this one, which is sad, I haven't seen anything yet, I just wanted to say, that its sad someone can be down on you for sharing the part of your life you allow "us" to see. When someone is struggling with life and voyuers into the little piece of your life you show, it would be easy and depressing to think you have everything..."we" know that isn't the case, that we all have our struggles, none of us are perfect yet, I guess all we can do is pray for those truly struggling and not seeing or realising that behind closed doors we are ostensibly all the same. Its not an easy journey for any of us. We should concentrate on the happy good times, they get us thru those hard times and make lifes daily chores less of a chore. I hope you continue your blogging and come to terms with those hurting in our world ~ I'm sure they don't mean to hurt. Hurt people hurt. Sad, but true. You don't need to publish this, I'm not writing it for public consumption. I wish you well. God Bless x

Paula said...

Hi,

I just wanted to say that your blog as made me at times roar with laughter and at others cry because of what you have been through. You capture the spirit of life in the lines you wirte for us. I check in each day to see what or if there is anything new. Your blog allows us to see that life is not all a bed of roses and that the likes of me don't feel so bad at our imperfections. There was only one perfect being on this earth and none of us can come close to him even if some people might like to think they are. Please keep writing the way you always do. Remember that those who only have time for unpleasantness and rudeness are to be pitied as they must have a strange outlook on life.

The very best and kindest wishes,

Paula

Susan said...

I'm sorry people have been unkind. I find it's usually jealousy at work when that happens! You have a lovely family, and I enjoy reading about your lives. Don't let these sad little people get to you!

Anonymous said...

Samantha, "Keep your face to the sun and you cannot see the shaddows." Ignore and delete those that post those ugly messages. Pray for them, too. (They must have really poor self-concepts and unhappy lives.) I think that you inspire many people, honey. Keep it up!

Soop

jenn said...

Oh dear, I am so sorry to hear of your troubles. That is one thing that really takes the fun out of blogging. If your anything like me I kind of use mine for a little diary of certain parts of my life. It is just a neat way of keeping some sort of record of this time that is flying by. I am so sorry you have had to deal with that mess...:(
I surely appreciate all of your hard work and always look forward to seeing what is new.
jenn

Anonymous said...

Please don't change a thing about how you blog. I love your style...all of it. You are one cool mama. From a fellow sewing mama who homeschools in the north.
Debbie (Debrond)
xxoo

Dawn said...

Samantha, I cannot imagine anyone being hurtful towards you and your family. I have had so much fun chatting with you on the phone and I am totally charmed by your sweetness. I have never for a moment doubted your sincerity or believed that you were anything but exactly who you are. I love reading all the fun stories about your life and I am delighted that your blog is so "real". Many of us are very fortunate to have very blessed lives and you are truly one of them!!!