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HELP!!!!! I MAY BE GOING CRAZY!

Hey friends,
I'm spillin it. I am so overwhelmed the last couple of weeks! I feel like I can't keep my head above water. I was up until 6 am two nights ago trying to get the house clean and working on my new pattern, now I feel like a zombie. It's 12 am and I'm blogging! I just feel so spread thin. I normally do school with Molly, cook, clean, and play with the kids during the day and then I work and blog at night, but lately I have had so much work to do there hasn't been much time for sleep. No sleep makes me grumpy. I was grumpy with my kids today, and now I feel like crap. Yep.....I said it .......the mama curse word......c-r-a-p. I felt like the worst mom in the world today. I felt like telling my kids when I apologised for being ugly "Mama don't even deserve a Mother's day. That's for sweet mamas.", but I didn't. I felt like such a loser. Even the blog makes me feel behind. I have so many tutorials that I would like to post, but they take so long to put together that it's not even feasible right now. I haven't even been able to read my favorite blogs. I'm going to take a few days off from blogland. I know you will all be here when I get back, right? When I get back I'll have a clean slate and I will do the tutorials as I get the time and for fun only. I don't want my happy place to be stressful and feel like work. I just need a few days to re-group, snuggle with my precious children, get some work done, and I'll be back fresh and happy. I think hormones have a role in this too. Not the pregnant ones though. That's another thing......sigh........... I know I will feel better in the morning. Just getting it all out in the open always makes me feel better. Thanks for listening.
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Comments

Autum said…
Happy Mother's Day! You are a sweet mother :) Relax and try not to feel so pressured, especially when it comes to blogging. That's the beauty of the blog, it is yours to do with what you will. It will wait for you. So have a restful Mother's Day. No more staying up all night!!
May 10, 2008 at 6:39 AM
Anonymous said…
Take a break, girl! You totally deserve it. Enjoy your Mother's Day! xoxo
May 10, 2008 at 7:03 AM
Anonymous said…
Absolutely take a break. The internet isn't going anywhere. And, never feel obliged to create tutorials! They're free! And most people understand what a labor of time and love they are.

Happy mother's day! =0)
May 10, 2008 at 7:52 AM
SHEILA said…
Samantha, I've always said motherhood can be one big guilt trip! But it's you (mothers in general) that puts the pressure on yourself. I do this all the time! And hormones do play a big role. You are a TERRIFIC MOM, so try to remember that! I will miss your posts, but family comes first. Have a wonderful Mothers Day. I'm sure your family will make it special for you because they know what a sweet mama they have. Take some time to relax, we'll be here...

Love and Blessings to you,
xoxo

PS I bet if you do relax, it will be the pregnancy hormones you'll be happily dealing with. It's hard to get pregnant when you're stressed.
May 10, 2008 at 7:52 AM
Granny P's World said…
You need to slow down my fellow Alabama friend! Take it from one who knows. (this is Pam from Tannehill by the way.) Right before Christmas, I thought I was about to croak between working full time and trying to get all the stuff out that folks had bought from me for Christmas gifts, and keeping up with housework, etc. We have to have some down time from everything once in a while. My youngest is getting ready to graduate from high school in less than two weeks, and I am beginning to feel such relief. I feel kind of guilty about feeling like that, its like I am finished raising school age children. Its about time since I am looking real hard at 50!!! Even though I know college is next, I feel like I have made such an accomplishment that she is graduating, and WITH HONORS. And believe me, I have felt more than once like I was not the best mom. So, Happy Mothers Day, take some time off and enjoy yourself!!!! We are all good moms. I think the saying goes something like "anyone can be a mother, but it takes someone special to be a Mom." I think thats right!!!
May 10, 2008 at 8:02 AM
"The Transplanted Yankee" said…
Oh darling...if I had known, I would have never asked you about my bridesmaid's dress. I know you would do an awesome job, but I will try to get someone else. I love you! I'll be praying for ya!
May 10, 2008 at 10:00 AM
Becky said…
Happy Mother's Day Sam. You are a wonderful mother. I only hope to be as great with my children one day.
May 11, 2008 at 2:09 AM
oliver rain said…
I was delinquent in my blogging for a few days and missed this post. I see from your later post that you are feeling better now and I'm so glad. Motherhood is so much work and we always feel obligated to be the PERFECT parent. However, what we fail to realize is just how "perfect" we already are without even trying. I can tell from your writings that you are a great mom.
May 11, 2008 at 11:39 AM
Megh said…
Oh, Samantha, you should come to the B & B for an Alaskan Vacation! That'd be restful, right? You can spare a week!
May 13, 2008 at 1:47 AM
Anonymous said…
Yes girl, take it easier. You have lovely young children, so thats hard work. The blogging can wait for a while, for when your relaxed. If you can afford it, get a cleaner to come in a few hours a week to help out. Remember to enjoy Life!
May 24, 2008 at 8:30 AM
Unknown said…
Don't be so hard on yourself. I have a sneaky suspicion you are doing a great job. I know this was a few weeks ago now so I hope you are feeling better about things.
May 24, 2008 at 10:38 PM
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